When you change the way
You look at things the things you look at change...
My name wasn’t always my favorite thing but it has grown on me over the years. My name as you know by now is Michelle, which means, "like God". When I was little everyone would sing Michelle (My bell) the Beatles song, and I would be embarrassed. I'm not actually sure why I would be, it wasn’t an embarrassing song. I just didn’t like people gushing over me I guess, I was an only child on my moms side of the family for a very longtime. I have not ever been close to my Knight side. I barely know any of them, I really only saw my grandmother on Christmas. I never met my grandfather because he died in a car accident the year I was born, well, he met me but I don't remember him because I was 6 months old.
When I came to my teens, other kids started singing GNR, My Michelle to me or at me and laugh, which was a bit more embarrassing due to the context of the song 😂. My middle name is Dawn named after my maternal grandfather, which was actually his middle name Donnelly…😂 that sounds super Irish. I had a nickname in elementary, Michelle Nightingale which I kind of liked, hence the reason knightn_gal is my email handle. My grandmother called me Shell, but she wanted my name to be Sara, and so did I! I loved the name Sara, no one ever had another girl so she ended up naming a baby doll she carried Sara…I know creepy right. A few others close to me called me Shelly, which I enjoyed especially after The Crow movie came out.
Eventually I stopped cringing and embraced my name. I even like my name in reverse, which I mentioned in the opening picture. I mean...can't beat the meaning. I am trying to live in a place of happiness, unattainable as it may be, but I try. I tend to be heaven and hell wrapped in the same package, so balanced right 😂? Right.
Anyways, I guess I can’t knock my grandmother's urge to personify inanimate objects. I also name other living things and inanimate objects that surround me like stuffed animals, crystals and plants, the birds. I have to baby quail living in the yard I named them jeeper and creeper. Anyways, she was pretty lonely after my grandfather passed. She had passed on many years ago in May around Mother’s Day so I tend to think about her a lot this time of year. Funny thing she also hated her name, and went by her middle name Katherine, but I won’t say it here out of respect, got to respect the dead.
I guess I'll end this entry here. For fun I listened to a handful of songs with my name in it today 🤣.